Partnerships: From Selves to One Another
by Alan Howell
Director of Church Relations
One of the major challenges for people involved in missions today is how to have fruitful partnerships that glorify God. What does it look like for us to partner well with others in ways that are good for everyone involved? In a previous post, we looked at how foundational stories, like “The Giving Tree” can shape our relationships in surprising ways by potentially making us think that one-sided, unhealthy partnerships are okay. We looked at how swapping stories can be an important step in finding new behavioral scripts that aid us in collaborating with others in ways that honor Christ.
Stories aren’t the only things, though, that can trip us up.
Sometimes, outdated models or patterns for how we understand things can end up doing more damage than we realize. When its shelf life has expired, a paradigm that seemed to be helpful for a while can end up hurting us and those we work with. One of those missions frameworks from a previous age that has continued to linger past its expiration date is known as the Three Selves or Four-Selves paradigm. That approach has been so popular that even if someone hasn’t heard of it before, it is likely that their involvement in missions was shaped by it.
The Selves approach assumed that establishing indigenous churches that are Self-Propagating, Self-Supporting, and Self-Governing (later including Self-Theologizing as a Fourth Self) was the “end goal” of missions. While this framework helped reorient missions towards independence (an important step that needed to be named 100+ years ago), the objective was still shaped by Western ideals and had significant pitfalls.
We Americans may assume, for example, that independence is the ultimate goal that everyone should strive for. But what would that mean for parts of the world where community and continuity in relationships were what was valued most? And how about languages where words for “self” are loaded with all the negative connotations of “selfish”? Would this framework really resonate with them? What would it feel like to have mission partners work with you and your church and it felt like a real relationship, and then suddenly the partnership was over (the mission was “accomplished” because of “independence”) and there was no more contact and relationship? Would that make you feel like a person or a project? Those questions (and more) reveal some important flaws in that popular mission script of the Selves that need to be addressed.
What if instead of terms like Selves and Independence, there was some common biblical language that could help us form and navigate partnerships well?
Thankfully, and unsurprisingly, Scripture has a lot to offer here to help us with that! The language of “one another” (ἀλλήλων), occurs 100 times in the New Testament and certainly has the potential to resonate even better than “selves” with the global Church today.
That story we told (and still tell) about the objective of missions, the script we’ve been using, our paradigm for partnership - whatever we want to call it - needs to shift. We need to move from the goal of independent “Selves” to an interdependent posture of “One-Another-ing” (or “Belonging”). For those who want to dig in more about this topic, elsewhere I go into more detail about a "One Another" framework that helps move beyond the language of mere autonomy (Selves) to the language of relationship and mutuality.
So, what we are suggesting here is definitely a paradigm shift! But for mission partnerships to succeed, we’ll need to flip the script and switch stories to make sure we’re all moving in the right direction. Hospitality and a commitment to accompany our partners will be key elements in making that happen. Moving beyond that outdated 100+ year-old vision of the Selves in order to adopt an approach that leans into a term found 100 times in our New Testaments can happen. When it does, it could have markers of success that look like this:
Respecting One Another’s Agency
Honoring One Another’s Authority
Mutual Sharing with One Another by means of all forms of Assistance
Long Term Commitment to One Another’s Advancement (i.e. flourishing)
Following this “one another” vision for reframing outputs, goals, and objectives also reframes the starting point of how we partner in missions. By updating and escaping the gravity of outdated but treasured theoretical missiological concepts like the Three-Selves (or Four-Selves) we can move beyond weak, one-sided partnerships and work together in ways that reveal a God who partners with all of us in powerful and honoring ways.
If you want to talk more about reframing your mission partnerships and what adopting a “one another” approach could look like, I would love to connect with you about it.
And in case you missed it, and you want to dig into more of the history of the Selves, the “One Another” proposal, and more, check out this resource – and be sure to check in with me if you have any issues accessing it.
May our partnerships in God’s mission truly reflect a way of interacting that honors one another and the One who created us all!